Growing in the sun ….

GROWING IN THE SUN …

Not growing up.

When are you grown up? Aren’t we always growing? Changing minds … changing attitudes and changing dress sense (thank goodness). I like the idea of evolving, organic, spilling out ….. Who wants to grow up, besides a teenager?

I have a happy, contented life but always wonder, …have I done enough during the first 40-odd years of my life?… which opportunities have I missed ?, do I only remember happy times? Why am I so lucky to have had a favourable outcome when other have suffered so. But we all live our own reality – everyone’s suffering differs. Suffering to some may not be so bad for others, they have a lower level of suffering. Suffering is like being pushed out of your comfort zone. To some, using the public facilities may be their version of hell, to others, not so much! I liken myself to a sunflower growing in the African sun. Face to the sun and surviving through it all. A happy sight that makes people smile.

There are many words to describe my upbringing but idyllic is the one I like most. Overused maybe, but it works for me. We were encouraged to simply be children in the natural surrounds of the farm. We were encouraged to be bored. We were encouraged to be busy, whatever we did, we did with all our energy, wholeheartedly and to the best of our ability. “Work hard and play hard” my Dad would say as he gave us a bear hug dropping us at boarding school at the beginning of each new school term. Mom was an anchor during adventurous times. Never too far away but certainly not too close either. She was always willing to enjoy our adventures with us be it with her bum in the air crawling through our fort or sitting on our wooden stump chairs having “tea”. My parents were the archetype for the buzz word “fertile neglect”. Giving us the perfect environment to grow and thrive, not only survive, with no hovering. This is not to be confused with parental neglect! Growing up and raising children in Africa encourages you to live like that. Parents learn to respond quickly to any situation always be aware and alert but not obvious about it.

I only have positive memories of my childhood and put that down to my ability to limit awareness of my surrounds, I am very self-absorbed (in a good way, I like to think) and very present in the moment at times. I do find this bothers me and I do try to think ahead but it must be a conscious decision. I am reminded of a quote by one on my idols, Winnie-the-pooh. He asks piglet what day is it”” and piglet squeeks “it is today”. Pooh said “My favorite day” . I would not be surprised if I was told about a tragic car accident in which I had lost all my memories and all the happy memories that my family could think of were downloaded into my head. OK I have a bad memories of Dad hitting us for some bad behavior – but only once! The Tao of Pooh by Benjamin Hoff is one of the books I try to live by. To think therefor I am confused … sounds right to me! Limit the needless hustle and bustle. Think less ! (Sounds like advice my brothers would give me!

Envy has never bothered me and I have no problem with my self-esteem. I think I am great. When I walk into a room, although I know very well I am no size 8, I act as if I am. I try to light up the environment and love to be the center of attention. The vision of being a sunflower (definitely not a wallflower) goes through my head. I never would have admitted this until I had meet Lisa (my long lost sister) who is just gorgeous. She is an actress. She is great. She is loved by all. She lights up a room when she walks in.

“I am a princess … because my Dad is a King” rings true for my childhood . It also rings true for my adult life, I will adjust the quote slightly to read “I am a princess … because I am married to a King

intro section of “growing in the sun” by Hayley Muirhead

My Baptism certificate – proving I am legit before you start reading my stories…

The three musketeers – Kerry (my oldest sister front right) Kemsley my oldest brother (still in nappies – cute!!!) and me with a book in my hand – intellectual even in early years !